Lap-Band Surgery!

I've been writing this post in my head for awhile now; I couldn't decide if I wanted to tell people for fear of what they might think. I don't know why I care what other people think, but I do. I worry that people will think I'm taking the "easy" way out. I know what people think about overweight people, because I think it too, "Why don't you just NOT eat so much and get some exercise!" For some people it is that easy, maybe they don't have the genetic predisposition to being overweight, maybe they don't have "issues" with food and eating, for whatever reason, weight is just not a struggle for some. The first "diet" I remember was in 4th Grade. It wasn't really a diet, it was a program at Arkansas Children's Hospital for overweight kids that taught us about healthy eating, exercise, etc. And since then it's been a constant cycle of lose weight, gain it all back plus some! I know more about nutrition and what someone SHOULD eat to lose weight than most people. I've tried every "program" and "diet" under the sun. My last attempt was January of 2011, it was my first attempt at losing weight since I had kids and I was ready! I lost 50 lbs. in about 6 months, after that I started struggling again but was able to maintain it for another 6 months. In January of 2012 we decided to sale our house and build our new house. Lots of stress and excitement and BOOM! 40 lbs was back on in no time! SO, on Tuesday, July 31, my mom and I attended a seminar for the Lap-Band Weight Loss Surgery. I've looked into the Lap-Band Surgery in years past, but the time was just never right. Because our insurance doesn't cover the surgery, we were told the process would be much shorter! I called the doctor the next morning and the wheels started to roll! Last Wednesday I got all of my paperwork faxed in and got all of my bloodwork drawn. Last Saturday night I went in for a Sleep Study, Monday I went for my Pre-Op Consultation, today I started a 900 calorie diet to prepare my body for surgery (this serves to shrink the liver so that surgery and recovery are easier), on August 23 I'll have a couple of Pre-Op Appointments at Baptist Hospital and THEN Friday August 24, I will go in for the Surgery!
I'm getting so excited about the surgery! Like, BIG LIFE CHANGE excited! Like, getting married or having a baby EXCITED! Am I scared? TERRIFIED! Every other attempt at weight loss has failed, so I am petrified of failure! I mean, if I fail at this, what do I do then??? BUT, I know I won't fail, I have an amazing support system and I am excited about the changes to come!
So, in closing, I ask this of you, please don't judge me. I know many of you don't struggle with food or weight and so you might not understand my struggle; just like I may not understand the struggles of someone else. I DO appreciate any encouragement and LOTS of prayer!